Conjugial Love (Chadwick) n. 175

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175. A wife cannot be involved in the duties proper to a husband, nor conversely can a man be involved in the duties proper to a wife. This is because the difference between them is like that between wisdom and the love of it, or between thought and the affection for it, or between the intellect and the will which activates it. In the duties proper to a man the leading role is played by the intellect, thought and wisdom. But in the duties proper to a wife the leading role is played by the will, affection and love. These impel a wife to perform her duties, the other group impel a man to perform his. The diversity of their duties is the consequence of the natures of men and wives; but they still lead by stages to a progressive linking.

[2] Many people believe that women can perform the duties of men, provided they are introduced to them at a sufficiently early age, just as boys are. But they can be taught to perform them, not to judge them; and it is on this that the inner correctness of their duties depends. As a result, women who have been introduced to men's duties are obliged in matters of judgment to consult their menfolk, and then, if they are given freedom, they choose from the advice they receive what suits their love.

[3] Some are of the opinion that women can equally lift the gaze of their intellect into the sphere of light which men enjoy, so perceiving things equally deeply. This opinion has been supported by the writings of certain learned authoresses. But when these writings of theirs were investigated in their presence in the spiritual world, they turned out to be the products, not of judgment and wisdom, but of cleverness and facility. What results from the latter two qualities is made by the elegance and neatness of composition to seem sublime and learned; but only to those who call every display of cleverness wisdom.

[4] The reason why men cannot be involved either in the duties proper to women, and perform them correctly, is that they cannot assume women's affections, which are quite distinct from those of men. It was because the affections and perceptions of the male sex were thus distinguished from creation, and so became their nature, that one of the statutes of the Children of Israel was:

A woman is not to wear man's clothing, nor a man woman's clothing; for this is an abomination. Deut. 22:5.

The reason is that in the spiritual world everyone is dressed according to his affections, and the two separate sets of affections of a woman and a man cannot be united except in the persons of two people; it can never happen in one person.


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