The linking of minds in the case of those who enjoy truly conjugial love increases, as was proved in the chapter dealing with the linking of souls and minds by marriage, as meant by the Lord's words 'they shall be no longer two, but one flesh' (see 156bis-181).

[2] The reason why that linking increases as friendship links itself to love is that friendship is, so to speak, the face of that love, and also like its clothing. For it not only attaches itself to love like clothing, but is also linked to it like a face. The love which precedes friendship resembles sexual love, which once it has achieved its object fades away; but love linked to friendship lasts after it has achieved its object and is strengthened by its success. It also penetrates deeper into the chest; friendship opens the way for it and makes it truly conjugial. Then that love makes this friendship too truly conjugial. This kind of friendship is very different from the friendship based on any other love, for here it is at its fullest.

[3] As is well known, the opposite happens in the case of those who have no conjugial love. In their case the early friendship which springs up at the time of an engagement and then in the first days of marriage, recedes further and further from the inner regions of the mind, and by stages reaches the point where it retires to the outer layers of the skin. In the case of those who have separation in mind, it departs altogether; but in the case of those who do not, love lingers at the outer level, though the inner levels are cold.