1823. I spoke with them-which is done by an inward speech-and they were surprised that I would give to the poor, thinking that it must be for gaining merit, and therefore should not be done. I replied that it is only to satisfy the conscience, for conscience dictates it. If one goes against the conscience, it is a sin, which carries its own punishment, since there is punishment in every sin. But one must not expect a reward, and thus do it to gain credit. I saw, in fact, by a spiritual idea, that if there is even the least bit of self-merit, one obtains no reward whatsoever. For all spiritual reward comes from mercy, and self-merit is repugnant to mercy. For this reason also, some spirits are very surprised that they obtain nothing for having done good deeds in their life, because it was for their own sake, so that they would be rewarded. However, it is different if this is done in simplicity and innocence, by one who does not know otherwise than that one may do good deeds for the sake of reward.